1
00:00:03,280 --> 00:00:06,720
Whoa, greetings from Tromaville and
welcome to the lovingly recreated,

2
00:00:06,720 --> 00:00:12,300
remastered, director's cut DVD of that
incredible movie, Coming Out. Yes,

3
00:00:12,300 --> 00:00:17,240
Out is the true story of an anonymous
Jewish filmmaker who discovers the homo

4
00:00:17,240 --> 00:00:21,880
within as he's directing that
Tromasterpiece, Poultry Geist, directed

5
00:00:21,880 --> 00:00:25,440
Kaufman. Now, I'm not going to tell you
who that anonymous Jewish filmmaker is,

6
00:00:25,560 --> 00:00:30,760
but man, do I like a penis gondola
shoved up my chocolate canal, huh? What?

7
00:00:31,160 --> 00:00:36,140
Lloyd? The movie's called Acting Out,
not Coming Out, and it has nothing to do

8
00:00:36,140 --> 00:00:37,200
with you having sex with men.

9
00:00:37,420 --> 00:00:41,360
Oh, of course, of course not. And
besides, I love my beard. I mean, my

10
00:00:42,080 --> 00:00:46,240
Hey, how about some football, man? Hey,
Toxie, let's go do some fag -bashing,

11
00:00:46,300 --> 00:00:50,360
huh? What is Acting Out about? I bet
it's about some really hot bitches,

12
00:00:50,920 --> 00:00:55,020
It is hot. It's directed by Oscar winner
Ralph Rosenblum and Carl Gurvich, the

13
00:00:55,020 --> 00:00:57,900
Jewish Mitchell brothers, but they
didn't murder each other. Ralph

14
00:00:57,900 --> 00:01:00,360
got the Oscar for Woody Allen's Annie
Hall, right?

15
00:01:00,580 --> 00:01:06,480
Ralph Rosenblum also edited Troma Stuck
on You, available at www .troma .com.

16
00:01:07,340 --> 00:01:10,900
Well, tell me, Dispepsio, tell me a
little more about what is Acting Out

17
00:01:10,900 --> 00:01:14,580
about? It's about regular, everyday
people talking about their sexual

18
00:01:14,580 --> 00:01:19,460
and acting them out on film. Wow, you
mean just regular fantasies, like orgies

19
00:01:19,460 --> 00:01:24,160
full of young, hairless Asian boys,
anonymous sex at Route 47 rest stops

20
00:01:24,160 --> 00:01:27,660
gruff men named Tino and Chewy? Normal
fantasies like that?

21
00:01:28,040 --> 00:01:29,380
Well, yes, Lloyd.

22
00:01:29,780 --> 00:01:32,200
And I'm here to be like the actors in
the film.

23
00:01:32,750 --> 00:01:37,150
I'm going to help you act out your
deepest, darkest sexual fantasy.

24
00:01:38,090 --> 00:01:39,090
Okay.

25
00:01:39,290 --> 00:01:41,110
How about you rub my balls?

26
00:01:42,730 --> 00:01:44,530
Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.

27
00:01:45,010 --> 00:01:47,330
Oh, yeah. Yeah, you like that.

28
00:01:48,330 --> 00:01:53,170
Stop it. I want you to take my package,
and I want you to beat my meat.

29
00:01:53,410 --> 00:01:54,950
Oh, you like that, don't you?

30
00:01:55,390 --> 00:01:56,390
Oh, yeah.

31
00:01:56,590 --> 00:01:58,490
You dirty, dirty boy.

32
00:01:58,710 --> 00:01:59,710
Oh, take it.

33
00:02:00,910 --> 00:02:03,330
You toss my salad. You hear me? You toss
my salad.

34
00:02:04,590 --> 00:02:05,970
Oh, wow.

35
00:02:06,310 --> 00:02:09,930
Yeah. Oh, I'm coming. I'm acting out and
I'm coming.

36
00:02:10,729 --> 00:02:13,650
That was real balsamic.

37
00:02:13,970 --> 00:02:19,150
Okay, this Pepsi. Let me fondle those
incredible big white milk jugs. I want

38
00:02:19,150 --> 00:02:22,650
fondle them and see if I can get some
real vitamin D. Hurry up.

39
00:02:23,390 --> 00:02:24,770
Give me the jugs.

40
00:02:25,360 --> 00:02:28,960
Oh, I love it when you play with my
jugs. Oh, God, yeah.

41
00:02:29,660 --> 00:02:31,740
Oh, that's even better.

42
00:02:32,180 --> 00:02:36,020
Oh, yeah, that was good. That was good.

43
00:02:36,560 --> 00:02:38,900
Is there anything else I can do for you,
Lloyd?

44
00:02:39,680 --> 00:02:44,020
Yes, there is, Super Tromethyspepsia. I
would like to insert my penis into your

45
00:02:44,020 --> 00:02:45,020
hot, throbbing vagina.

46
00:02:45,400 --> 00:02:46,400
What?

47
00:02:48,360 --> 00:02:52,160
Acting out your crazy sexual fantasies
in front of the world is one thing, but

48
00:02:52,160 --> 00:02:53,920
sexual harassment is against the law.

49
00:02:55,370 --> 00:02:56,370
ass, Kaufman.

50
00:02:56,750 --> 00:03:01,650
No, no, wait, wait. How am I going to
explain all this missing food to my

51
00:03:01,730 --> 00:03:07,630
I mean, my wife. Well, at any rate, get
ready to enjoy the digitally remastered,

52
00:03:07,630 --> 00:03:11,890
lovingly recreated, director's cut
version of Ralph Rosenblum and Carl

53
00:03:12,050 --> 00:03:13,210
Acting Out.

54
00:03:13,630 --> 00:03:17,430
Oh, my, oh, my, let's watch.

55
00:03:49,930 --> 00:03:55,610
Some time ago, a group of filmmakers
decided to see if sexual fantasies could

56
00:03:55,610 --> 00:04:00,110
put on the screen in a way that would be
both dramatically interesting and

57
00:04:00,110 --> 00:04:04,910
tastefully erotic. The producers placed
advertisements in newspapers and

58
00:04:04,910 --> 00:04:10,270
national magazines, questioned people at
random on the street, and held public

59
00:04:10,270 --> 00:04:11,430
and private interviews.

60
00:04:11,870 --> 00:04:16,709
It was decided that the fantasies should
star the people whose imaginations

61
00:04:16,709 --> 00:04:17,709
created them.

62
00:04:17,850 --> 00:04:22,330
People who, for one reason or another,
wouldn't mind interrupting the ordinary

63
00:04:22,330 --> 00:04:28,270
course of their lives in order to turn
fancy into moments of photographed fact.

64
00:04:28,650 --> 00:04:35,570
Well, offhand, my sexual fantasy would
be to see Raquel Welch and King Kong

65
00:04:35,570 --> 00:04:38,270
in a sexual relationship.

66
00:04:39,150 --> 00:04:40,330
I'd want to start it.

67
00:04:40,670 --> 00:04:42,530
Well, that's good. You could start it.

68
00:04:43,310 --> 00:04:49,070
I have a fantasy of going around
Manhattan with just my coat on and no

69
00:04:49,070 --> 00:04:51,010
underneath. That's a secret fantasy.

70
00:04:51,410 --> 00:04:58,010
The kinky part is that they're all
eating salad, and they use a certain

71
00:04:58,010 --> 00:05:02,990
salad dressing. Can I say this? Sure,
anything you like. Well, they use fresh

72
00:05:02,990 --> 00:05:07,660
salmon. as their salad dressing. Well,
how do they get it? They have to

73
00:05:07,660 --> 00:05:09,140
it themselves from the waiter.

74
00:05:09,400 --> 00:05:13,060
Oh, well, I don't think I'll be able to
be in the film because I'm leaving town

75
00:05:13,060 --> 00:05:14,060
the end of this week.

76
00:05:14,140 --> 00:05:16,380
Well, could you tell us what your
fantasy would be?

77
00:05:16,700 --> 00:05:17,760
You're leaving town?

78
00:05:18,060 --> 00:05:22,880
Yeah. I'm going to be leaving town
because I'm going on this trucking trip.

79
00:05:23,180 --> 00:05:25,820
I'm going to be driving a tractor
trailer for about six months.

80
00:05:28,320 --> 00:05:29,320
Fireman.

81
00:05:29,660 --> 00:05:32,320
Fireman? Fireman. Fireman. For some
reason, it passed.

82
00:05:32,800 --> 00:05:37,860
One fireman. For the past three months,
for some reason, they turned me on. My

83
00:05:37,860 --> 00:05:43,740
big thing is to make love to my own
image in a woman.

84
00:05:44,860 --> 00:05:48,660
To make love to your own image in a
woman. That's right. A woman that will

85
00:05:48,660 --> 00:05:49,660
own image.

86
00:05:49,700 --> 00:05:51,440
In other words, it looks just like you.
Exactly.

87
00:05:51,860 --> 00:05:55,020
Sex is something that should be
explored. Right.

88
00:05:55,260 --> 00:05:57,640
You know, it's still a pioneer's field.

89
00:06:57,230 --> 00:07:02,170
During the weeks of interviewing, it
became apparent that a great lack of

90
00:07:02,170 --> 00:07:07,630
inhibition was abroad in America, and
that a wide variety of people would, if

91
00:07:07,630 --> 00:07:12,770
given the opportunity, step in front of
a camera and act out their most intimate

92
00:07:12,770 --> 00:07:13,930
sexual dreams.

93
00:07:15,090 --> 00:07:20,090
Those who were anxious to appear in such
a movie were invited to a private club

94
00:07:20,090 --> 00:07:24,530
in New York, where an audition of their
sexual fantasies took place.

95
00:07:25,150 --> 00:07:27,010
And a final selection was made.

96
00:07:27,290 --> 00:07:28,590
My fantasy.

97
00:07:28,910 --> 00:07:30,310
My fantasy is.

98
00:07:30,550 --> 00:07:31,850
My sexual fantasy.

99
00:07:32,310 --> 00:07:33,310
My fantasy begins.

100
00:07:33,530 --> 00:07:39,390
My fantasy is. My fantasy is being
dominated by women.

101
00:07:40,230 --> 00:07:43,990
Is that it? Well, here we are in the
locker room.

102
00:07:44,210 --> 00:07:49,210
I don't know what else to say, but
welcome to That's Hollywood.

103
00:07:54,640 --> 00:08:01,560
I would like to be ravaged by a woman
right now, if it can be arranged, which

104
00:08:01,560 --> 00:08:02,560
probably will be.

105
00:08:03,160 --> 00:08:06,760
And I'm a loss for words right now.

106
00:08:07,520 --> 00:08:11,580
I would really like to see a couple make
love, you know, if I could be involved

107
00:08:11,580 --> 00:08:15,700
in a couple making love in a
weightlessness situation, which would be

108
00:08:15,700 --> 00:08:21,600
of thing to where you have two people in
a weightlessness situation.

109
00:08:22,730 --> 00:08:26,450
To where it's just interaction between
the two couples. There's no bed.

110
00:08:27,050 --> 00:08:28,530
There's no outside influences.

111
00:08:28,950 --> 00:08:33,210
There aren't any sounds at all. It's
just totally the pushing and pulling

112
00:08:33,210 --> 00:08:39,950
between me or, you know, whoever is
acting out the part and the other

113
00:08:40,169 --> 00:08:45,350
I don't know. Maybe I fantasize about
her being tied down, you know.

114
00:08:47,290 --> 00:08:50,330
I saw a movie the other night with
lipstick.

115
00:08:51,390 --> 00:08:52,550
Something that was on cable TV.

116
00:08:53,010 --> 00:08:55,950
And the girl was tied down to the bed.
The guy tied her down, you know.

117
00:08:56,350 --> 00:09:00,110
And I'm not saying that that's what I
would like to do, but it's interesting,

118
00:09:00,230 --> 00:09:00,929
you know.

119
00:09:00,930 --> 00:09:04,410
Maybe I don't... I'll tell you, when I
was a girl, it wanted me to do that

120
00:09:04,590 --> 00:09:05,590
But I didn't have a rope.

121
00:09:07,770 --> 00:09:12,290
It proved by no means an easy task to
decide who should be chosen.

122
00:09:12,930 --> 00:09:15,310
Many fine fantasies had to be rejected.

123
00:09:15,840 --> 00:09:19,320
some because of the unique production
problems they posed.

124
00:09:19,640 --> 00:09:26,600
My fantasy is to have a great big castle
rock home

125
00:09:26,600 --> 00:09:32,560
with great big steeples sitting up on a
big hill with

126
00:09:32,560 --> 00:09:38,220
velvet drapes and plenty carpets,

127
00:09:38,220 --> 00:09:43,180
great big ink -sized beds with satin.

128
00:09:46,500 --> 00:09:52,620
to dress in leather, to be a sadist.

129
00:09:54,020 --> 00:10:00,040
I like to have a black leather suit, a
black leather whip.

130
00:10:01,820 --> 00:10:05,980
And I would like to torture some of the
people that have done me wrong.

131
00:10:06,620 --> 00:10:11,560
I would like to give them the Indian
torture, you know, and take them in the

132
00:10:11,560 --> 00:10:13,200
desert and bury them.

133
00:10:13,940 --> 00:10:20,040
alive with the prick sticking up and the
red ants to eat it up.

134
00:10:20,820 --> 00:10:24,340
And then there were those fantasies that
we felt had been too carefully

135
00:10:24,340 --> 00:10:29,100
contrived. Jesus, myself, and Mary
Magdalene.

136
00:10:29,560 --> 00:10:34,880
And there she is before him, her face
upturned, tears on her face.

137
00:10:35,100 --> 00:10:42,020
And now we have a cut to, remember the
soldiers? Yes, the soldiers lusting

138
00:10:42,020 --> 00:10:43,020
Mary Magdalene.

139
00:10:44,329 --> 00:10:49,310
She, in her agony, trying to decide how
to make this easier for her Lord.

140
00:10:49,950 --> 00:10:51,790
And all of a sudden it comes to her.

141
00:10:52,410 --> 00:10:53,630
As it were.

142
00:10:56,530 --> 00:10:57,650
Tell us what comes to her.

143
00:11:00,870 --> 00:11:03,450
The perfect way to ease his pain.
Exactly.

144
00:11:04,170 --> 00:11:06,910
He is coming, he is coming, he is coming
soon.

145
00:11:08,070 --> 00:11:10,550
And so, in fact, he does.

146
00:11:11,280 --> 00:11:16,000
Others, though fascinating to listen to,
were found to be a little too complex

147
00:11:16,000 --> 00:11:17,260
to be put on film.

148
00:11:17,480 --> 00:11:24,260
My fantasy basically is to embody the
bringing together of the male -female

149
00:11:24,260 --> 00:11:28,920
split into a single mood and a single
person.

150
00:11:31,080 --> 00:11:37,360
For most of my life, I have been
feminine in relation to men and

151
00:11:37,360 --> 00:11:38,360
relation to women.

152
00:11:39,960 --> 00:11:44,120
then played variations on that,
masculine with men and feminine with

153
00:11:44,260 --> 00:11:50,800
until it got so complicated that the
number of roles seemed beyond

154
00:11:50,800 --> 00:11:52,740
my ability to control.

155
00:11:54,000 --> 00:11:59,200
I'm at a point now where I think I can
put the entire thing together in a

156
00:11:59,200 --> 00:12:05,620
action. And what I want to do is to have
one man and one woman

157
00:12:05,620 --> 00:12:08,180
to work with to...

158
00:12:08,760 --> 00:12:15,700
do various things with them, working
faster and faster until it

159
00:12:15,700 --> 00:12:20,980
reaches a point where it becomes obvious
that what I have become is an empty

160
00:12:20,980 --> 00:12:25,540
channel for what's flowing between the
two of them and attaining a pure

161
00:12:25,540 --> 00:12:27,700
androgynous state in that.

162
00:12:28,860 --> 00:12:32,180
And some had to be abandoned for
personal reasons.

163
00:12:32,820 --> 00:12:38,220
Nancy Morgan, a mother and
businesswoman, felt it would be unfair

164
00:12:38,220 --> 00:12:42,580
to go any further with her fantasy than
an extremely candid interview.

165
00:12:43,040 --> 00:12:45,740
Most of my fantasy center around
degradation.

166
00:12:46,020 --> 00:12:47,720
I love to be degraded.

167
00:12:48,220 --> 00:12:55,140
I like to have someone shit, you know,
in front of me and play with it and

168
00:12:55,140 --> 00:12:56,280
have to smear it on myself.

169
00:12:57,800 --> 00:13:04,780
I like to pretend I'm tasting it and be
whipped, you know, while I'm tasting

170
00:13:04,780 --> 00:13:08,100
it. As if I'm really being made to taste
it and I hate it.

171
00:13:08,580 --> 00:13:10,120
I like to be pissed on.

172
00:13:11,060 --> 00:13:15,580
I've only had one opportunity in my life
to act out all these fantasies.

173
00:13:16,480 --> 00:13:20,200
And more so, more than I've mentioned
here to the extreme, it's with a person

174
00:13:20,200 --> 00:13:21,200
love very much.

175
00:13:22,080 --> 00:13:26,380
I've done it sort of superficially and
less with other people. But it took me

176
00:13:26,380 --> 00:13:30,600
many years to even bring up that I
wanted to do them. And I felt that it

177
00:13:30,600 --> 00:13:33,600
me to contact my...

178
00:13:34,200 --> 00:13:39,120
Sex, myself, the person I love, other
people that we've gotten involved with,

179
00:13:39,240 --> 00:13:45,060
and it's made me, actually, I feel a lot
healthier and a lot more capable of

180
00:13:45,060 --> 00:13:51,060
really loving, aside from how bizarre
and how... I find that with fantasies,

181
00:13:51,060 --> 00:13:56,080
it's not... It's far less genital or
cold for me than even standard, you

182
00:13:56,080 --> 00:14:00,780
one -night stands or whatever, because
when you expose yourself on this level,

183
00:14:00,860 --> 00:14:02,760
you have to really trust another person.

184
00:14:04,660 --> 00:14:09,600
Weeks later, those who were chosen would
be taken far from the neighborhoods of

185
00:14:09,600 --> 00:14:13,540
their daily lives out into a countryside
of secret landscapes.

186
00:14:14,280 --> 00:14:20,240
A magical manor, a soft, sloping hill,
decorated with figures that have been

187
00:14:20,240 --> 00:14:23,300
fashioned to suit a variety of whims and
desires.

188
00:14:23,880 --> 00:14:29,960
While one is here, everything is
possible, and the most grotesque or

189
00:14:29,960 --> 00:14:31,380
wish will be granted.

190
00:14:32,110 --> 00:14:37,490
It was the job of the filmmakers to help
people fulfill their fantasies. We

191
00:14:37,490 --> 00:14:43,410
provided the details of people, place,
and costume. But from then on, the

192
00:14:43,410 --> 00:14:46,590
fantasies and fantasts were on their
own.

193
00:14:46,990 --> 00:14:52,990
To perform in the fantasies, a resident
company of actors was assembled to serve

194
00:14:52,990 --> 00:14:55,950
the imaginations of the film's amateur
stars.

195
00:14:56,670 --> 00:15:00,030
They accepted the fact that they would
be called upon to be everything from

196
00:15:00,030 --> 00:15:05,070
simple props of passion to embodiments
of long -sought -after perfect lovers.

197
00:15:05,590 --> 00:15:11,410
Most had been in erotic films before,
but never when illusion and reality had

198
00:15:11,410 --> 00:15:12,870
been so finely mixed.

199
00:15:13,230 --> 00:15:16,990
How far are we to go with these people?
In other words, I'm willing to do, you

200
00:15:16,990 --> 00:15:19,930
know, if it's a sexual fantasy, I'm
willing to have sex with someone.

201
00:15:20,190 --> 00:15:24,010
But how far can I go with people's
fantasies? In other words, where it

202
00:15:24,010 --> 00:15:25,750
or could become abusive.

203
00:15:26,640 --> 00:15:30,120
to myself physically or you know people
are into weird things i mean they want

204
00:15:30,120 --> 00:15:33,020
to line me up and shoot me i mean don't
you think there could be some sort of

205
00:15:33,020 --> 00:15:36,620
psychological harm done to the people
when they realize that their fantasy

206
00:15:36,620 --> 00:15:40,620
fantasy might have nurtured for so many
years maybe all their life is a failure

207
00:15:40,620 --> 00:15:44,780
doesn't work doesn't do anything for
them might be a benefit is

208
00:15:44,780 --> 00:15:50,920
when you work even in improvisation
you're working with actors that are very

209
00:15:50,920 --> 00:15:54,560
aware that what we're doing is illusion
In other words, a certain kind of

210
00:15:54,560 --> 00:15:58,180
professional attitude that you know, no
matter what you're saying to the person

211
00:15:58,180 --> 00:16:00,100
you're acting with, that it's illusion
here.

212
00:16:00,680 --> 00:16:05,940
Right. It's like a ballgame. You know,
we know where we are.

213
00:16:06,920 --> 00:16:07,920
We're playing.

214
00:16:07,980 --> 00:16:11,760
The star of the first fantasy arrives.

215
00:16:12,560 --> 00:16:18,340
She is Jeannie Joseph, a psychology
student who has found her own special

216
00:16:18,340 --> 00:16:20,480
fill in the duller moments of the
classroom.

217
00:16:21,100 --> 00:16:26,200
Like all those chosen for the film who
will follow her, Jeannie will meet the

218
00:16:26,200 --> 00:16:30,940
actors and see the setting of her
fantasy for the first time when she

219
00:16:30,940 --> 00:16:31,940
front of the cameras.

220
00:16:32,120 --> 00:16:37,680
There have been no rehearsals, no script
to study, and neither she nor the

221
00:16:37,680 --> 00:16:41,420
filmmakers know what will really happen
once her scene begins.

222
00:16:41,880 --> 00:16:45,860
My fantasy is something I've been acting
out actually in real life at school.

223
00:16:46,380 --> 00:16:48,780
I'm very turned on to one of my
teachers.

224
00:16:49,390 --> 00:16:53,950
and he and I have this sort of thing
that we play during class.

225
00:16:54,290 --> 00:16:58,750
I sort of consider it psychic sex, you
know, because we're having all these,

226
00:16:58,750 --> 00:17:03,730
like, things going on between us that
are really very sexual and very erotic,

227
00:17:03,790 --> 00:17:05,430
even though we haven't had sex.

228
00:17:05,829 --> 00:17:08,810
We're just having a lot of fun playing
out the whole game.

229
00:17:09,550 --> 00:17:12,770
Well, what's happening is that we're
going into what I'm imagining is

230
00:17:12,770 --> 00:17:16,040
in the class. Before that, it was... His
imagination, and this is what I'm

231
00:17:16,040 --> 00:17:20,079
thinking. So first we get a close -up of
me, like, showing me, like, going off.

232
00:17:21,980 --> 00:17:25,980
And this is what I do in my fantasy.
This state is vested in 1 % of the

233
00:17:25,980 --> 00:17:26,980
population.

234
00:17:27,760 --> 00:17:33,580
And this 1 % of the population controls
an undue influence on

235
00:17:33,580 --> 00:17:40,260
me, on the government of that state.

236
00:17:40,480 --> 00:17:42,420
Now, who's to say that a...

237
00:17:42,780 --> 00:17:46,460
That a communistic state has to be

238
00:17:46,460 --> 00:17:52,920
totalitarian.

239
00:17:57,280 --> 00:17:58,280
Go on.

240
00:17:58,520 --> 00:18:03,200
It can be democratic.

241
00:18:04,080 --> 00:18:07,000
I mean, whereas a capitalistic state can
be totalitarian.

242
00:18:07,680 --> 00:18:10,780
It is not whether we're really against
communism, but we should say that we're

243
00:18:10,780 --> 00:18:13,640
against totalitarianism, because that's
the real.

244
00:18:13,940 --> 00:18:14,940
You know what I'm again?

245
00:18:15,900 --> 00:18:16,900
Yeah,

246
00:18:17,100 --> 00:18:18,100
I know what you're again.

247
00:18:19,980 --> 00:18:20,980
Go on. Yeah.

248
00:18:22,600 --> 00:18:24,260
Are you having trouble giving your
lesson?

249
00:18:24,560 --> 00:18:25,560
It's difficult.

250
00:18:25,940 --> 00:18:27,500
It is. Is it getting harder?

251
00:18:27,860 --> 00:18:29,860
It may be soon.

252
00:18:31,260 --> 00:18:32,260
Now.

253
00:18:33,610 --> 00:18:38,790
I think it's wonderful if we can all
accept that we have a fantasy life and

254
00:18:38,790 --> 00:18:45,030
that's not something to be hidden and,
you know, kept in the closet and to feel

255
00:18:45,030 --> 00:18:47,490
guilty about. I think it's a beautiful
side of ourselves.

256
00:18:47,690 --> 00:18:51,550
And bringing a fantasy out into the open
and accepting it and, you know, even

257
00:18:51,550 --> 00:18:53,570
acting it out leads it to change.

258
00:18:53,870 --> 00:18:58,470
I thought about that one day. I sat
myself down and I asked myself, what is

259
00:18:58,670 --> 00:19:00,970
What is it that we all want? What are we
looking for?

260
00:19:01,730 --> 00:19:08,350
What I felt was that we want to feel
that we're not separate people, that

261
00:19:08,350 --> 00:19:12,890
not just individuals walking around and
lonely and feeling like separate egos,

262
00:19:12,890 --> 00:19:18,010
that we want to come together and feel
that we can become close enough to the

263
00:19:18,010 --> 00:19:19,590
point of actually merging.

264
00:19:19,970 --> 00:19:23,650
That's, to me, the best sex. That's what
I'm really interested in. I'm not

265
00:19:23,650 --> 00:19:26,970
really interested in having lustful sex,
except once in a while.

266
00:19:28,550 --> 00:19:33,630
Most of my fantasies take place either
while I'm making love or when I'm

267
00:19:33,630 --> 00:19:34,630
masturbating.

268
00:19:35,350 --> 00:19:40,370
And sometimes I have fantasies because I
have trouble coming and they excite me

269
00:19:40,370 --> 00:19:41,910
more and they make it easier to come.

270
00:19:44,310 --> 00:19:49,810
And my favorite fantasy and the
strangest thing about it is that it's

271
00:19:49,810 --> 00:19:53,350
weirdest one I have and my closest
friend had the same one.

272
00:19:54,370 --> 00:19:56,910
I'm lying on like an operating table.

273
00:19:57,640 --> 00:19:59,680
I don't know where it takes place.

274
00:20:00,660 --> 00:20:04,760
And all these men are standing around me
wearing dark suits.

275
00:20:04,980 --> 00:20:11,680
You want to see how I react when you
touch me, and you want to see what I

276
00:20:11,680 --> 00:20:14,040
like, and you're sort of inspecting me.

277
00:20:15,300 --> 00:20:18,600
I'm afraid of you, but you're not
affected by that at all.

278
00:20:21,040 --> 00:20:25,080
I don't know if I'm tied down, but I
know I can't get away. Yeah, calm down.

279
00:20:25,080 --> 00:20:30,600
they touch me in different places, and
they watch me, and they watch my

280
00:20:30,600 --> 00:20:31,600
response.

281
00:20:32,000 --> 00:20:35,080
And there's one man who's in a
wheelchair.

282
00:20:54,280 --> 00:20:59,960
The girl being so rudely examined is
Marsha Blau, a young writer who lives in

283
00:20:59,960 --> 00:21:00,639
New York.

284
00:21:00,640 --> 00:21:05,520
As the scene continued, she began to
feel that her fantasy was becoming too

285
00:21:05,520 --> 00:21:11,420
and that discomfort and fear were
gradually eroding any erotic feelings

286
00:21:11,420 --> 00:21:12,259
might have.

287
00:21:12,260 --> 00:21:14,120
It was absolutely asexual.

288
00:21:15,740 --> 00:21:21,220
Acting out of fantasy is not the same as
having one. And having people be...

289
00:21:21,560 --> 00:21:27,480
harsh and fantasy is actually soft and
sensual whereas in real life it's not

290
00:21:27,480 --> 00:21:33,500
difference between between keeping it in
my head and doing it was that no one

291
00:21:33,500 --> 00:21:37,180
could be what i would imagine them to be
because they're figments of my

292
00:21:37,180 --> 00:21:43,910
imagination no one could be that well i
I like to

293
00:21:43,910 --> 00:21:48,990
travel astrally, and the most
fascinating thing that I find about it

294
00:21:48,990 --> 00:21:53,830
people that are involved in my astral
travels aren't aware of it, and they are

295
00:21:53,830 --> 00:21:58,350
aware of the sensation, but as far as
the physical body itself, they're not

296
00:21:58,350 --> 00:21:59,350
aware of.

297
00:22:00,050 --> 00:22:04,330
First, you gather up all the elements
around you, the elements of the

298
00:22:04,330 --> 00:22:09,490
from the trees, the grass, the sky, the
wind itself, and you collect all of it,

299
00:22:09,490 --> 00:22:10,490
and you get into chi.

300
00:22:11,070 --> 00:22:16,670
and you unite your spirit with the
elements and you travel naturally, you

301
00:22:16,670 --> 00:22:22,170
the person, you hook on to their
vibration and their spirit, and you flow

302
00:22:22,170 --> 00:22:24,090
through the heavenly cosmic heavens.

303
00:22:30,310 --> 00:22:36,310
Once the astral journey began, there was
little to do except keep the camera on

304
00:22:36,310 --> 00:22:39,270
Taji and wait for something dramatic to
happen.

305
00:22:41,770 --> 00:22:46,410
The wait turned out to be longer than
expected, and we left Tassie for the

306
00:22:46,410 --> 00:22:49,590
moment in order to return to more
earthbound behavior.

307
00:22:51,010 --> 00:22:54,830
You may be interested in why I'm
appearing without my face.

308
00:22:55,850 --> 00:23:00,150
I'm very interested in getting into this
show naked, and I'm interested in

309
00:23:00,150 --> 00:23:05,110
telling you my fantasy, but I thought
this was going to be a porn movie, and I

310
00:23:05,110 --> 00:23:08,450
have a family, and they might think it's
unfair.

311
00:23:08,710 --> 00:23:11,070
My wife knows about this.

312
00:23:11,660 --> 00:23:15,720
Being in this picture, being in this
interview, my children don't know a

313
00:23:15,720 --> 00:23:16,519
about it.

314
00:23:16,520 --> 00:23:19,780
And I worked at civil service, and I was
quite straight.

315
00:23:20,220 --> 00:23:25,140
And now that I've retired, I felt, gee,
modern times, why not get into all the

316
00:23:25,140 --> 00:23:30,440
act? So I've been out to the beach, and
I'm going to tell you about what my

317
00:23:30,440 --> 00:23:31,540
fantasy of sex is.

318
00:23:32,140 --> 00:23:36,600
I went out to the beach at Brighton. No,
I don't mean Brighton. I went out to

319
00:23:36,600 --> 00:23:37,600
the beach.

320
00:23:39,040 --> 00:23:44,440
I won't give the name, that they now
have people dressing without any

321
00:23:44,860 --> 00:23:46,840
And it's been very exciting and so on.

322
00:23:47,100 --> 00:23:51,620
And my fantasy is that I'm out there and
everybody's sitting there, some with

323
00:23:51,620 --> 00:23:53,880
clothes, some without clothes, and I
fall asleep.

324
00:23:56,180 --> 00:24:02,240
And then I wake up and there's a young
girl come over to me.

325
00:24:02,620 --> 00:24:07,880
She's interested in tickling me. She's
interested in having me have a party

326
00:24:07,880 --> 00:24:13,580
her. And either we have the party on the
beach or we have the party in her

327
00:24:13,580 --> 00:24:18,940
place. And my fantasy goes on to all
sorts of fun there.

328
00:24:19,180 --> 00:24:23,100
Most of the fun is similar to what
you've probably heard in other people's

329
00:24:23,100 --> 00:24:27,440
fantasies. I'm 63, but you know, things
don't change.

330
00:24:27,720 --> 00:24:32,040
And I visualize this girl on the beach
and the whole bunch of other girls on

331
00:24:32,040 --> 00:24:36,180
beach and fellas too, everybody, getting
into the act after this one girl starts

332
00:24:36,180 --> 00:24:37,180
with me.

333
00:24:37,200 --> 00:24:42,050
And I... See, at first she tickles me,
and I'm waking up, and I'm still

334
00:24:42,190 --> 00:24:48,350
and I had just been dreaming of having a
wonderful time with a girl,

335
00:24:48,410 --> 00:24:55,230
and she tickles me, and then I fondle
her breasts, and she likes

336
00:24:55,230 --> 00:25:01,510
it, and we kiss, we have a soul kiss,
and then it just gets great.

337
00:25:03,790 --> 00:25:06,170
And relying there.

338
00:25:07,229 --> 00:25:13,430
And, geez, I can't tell you how, in my
fantasy, it's just like when I was

339
00:25:13,430 --> 00:25:18,690
14 years old and I had the first
excitement. I didn't even know such a

340
00:25:18,690 --> 00:25:19,690
could happen.

341
00:25:43,720 --> 00:25:46,640
I was going to come here for the
interview, and I was thrilled to have

342
00:25:46,640 --> 00:25:47,640
interview.

343
00:25:48,180 --> 00:25:49,660
So I wanted to explain more.

344
00:25:50,600 --> 00:25:57,060
But when I came to doing it now, just a
fantasy of yourself,

345
00:25:57,460 --> 00:26:03,820
started in with a little thing. I saw it
was going to be a fantasy, and I could

346
00:26:03,820 --> 00:26:05,600
get into it. It sounded great.

347
00:26:06,140 --> 00:26:08,440
I told my fantasy, and it was real.

348
00:26:09,260 --> 00:26:11,840
It was sensuous, and it was great.

349
00:26:12,430 --> 00:26:15,670
and then when i came out and did it
everybody was such a help and it was

350
00:26:15,670 --> 00:26:20,490
beautiful and i enjoyed it very much and
now trying to think back and try to

351
00:26:20,490 --> 00:26:27,130
think what effect i'm having on you my
audience in this and uh the

352
00:26:27,130 --> 00:26:31,390
part that i have in the whole big thing
that all these wonderful people have

353
00:26:31,390 --> 00:26:37,250
been working for weeks on just to have a
movie for you i'm sort of stumped uh 20

354
00:26:37,250 --> 00:26:41,790
years ago 30 years ago i would have
liked to feel The way what I felt when I

355
00:26:41,790 --> 00:26:46,470
doing it, that I was doing a beautiful
act, and that this was something that

356
00:26:46,470 --> 00:26:52,430
going to be enjoyed by the people as
something beautiful, not as anything

357
00:26:52,430 --> 00:26:54,350
in any way was taboo.

358
00:26:55,590 --> 00:27:01,050
The liberation it took the gentleman in
the last scene so long to achieve seems

359
00:27:01,050 --> 00:27:06,030
to have come naturally to Andrea Cox,
the happily married woman from

360
00:27:06,050 --> 00:27:11,200
Michigan. who takes America's love of
team sports, and football in particular,

361
00:27:11,480 --> 00:27:13,160
to a literal conclusion.

362
00:27:13,680 --> 00:27:14,980
My name is Andrea.

363
00:27:15,520 --> 00:27:19,900
I'm a nurse. My husband wrote this. I've
always fantasized filming my wife

364
00:27:19,900 --> 00:27:21,160
making love with other men.

365
00:27:21,480 --> 00:27:24,440
And my wife dreams of making it with
several men simultaneously.

366
00:27:24,920 --> 00:27:28,060
She even told me she'd like to make it
with the New York Jets.

367
00:27:28,620 --> 00:27:33,460
He thinks this is just beautiful. It's a
very big turn -on for him. I mean, we

368
00:27:33,460 --> 00:27:36,500
love each other very much, and we have a
very open relationship.

369
00:27:38,540 --> 00:27:43,900
Where I come from, it's a very strict
Catholic area, and people are just not

370
00:27:43,900 --> 00:27:48,980
that open. I think they would like to
be, but they just don't know how to be.

371
00:27:49,060 --> 00:27:53,280
They're afraid or something, which is
really silly, but I just know so many

372
00:27:53,280 --> 00:27:55,380
people who would love to be in my shoes
right now.

373
00:27:56,300 --> 00:27:57,980
Yes, I think this is fantastic.

374
00:27:59,020 --> 00:28:00,760
I want to do my scene.

375
00:28:01,220 --> 00:28:02,220
Play ball.

376
00:28:11,760 --> 00:28:15,800
You've been elected, most likely to
love.

377
00:28:16,440 --> 00:28:20,900
You've been elected, you're the one
we've been dreaming of.

378
00:28:21,340 --> 00:28:24,800
Now, when they give you the eye, well,
they're not to blame.

379
00:28:25,180 --> 00:28:29,660
Those winning charms and those loving
arms, they ought to put you in the Hall

380
00:28:29,660 --> 00:28:33,940
Fame. You've been elected, most likely
to give.

381
00:28:34,880 --> 00:28:38,960
You've been selected to be that very
special man.

382
00:28:39,440 --> 00:28:43,520
And when they counted the votes, the
landslides said you were just the most

383
00:28:43,520 --> 00:28:50,100
likely and lovable one to fall in love
with. Oh, baby, you're the people's

384
00:28:50,100 --> 00:28:51,900
choice. These are my angels.

385
00:28:52,860 --> 00:28:55,480
I'm taking these guys home with me.
They're going to be my private football

386
00:28:55,480 --> 00:28:56,480
team.

387
00:28:57,120 --> 00:28:59,900
I really didn't notice anybody was here
until just now.

388
00:29:01,580 --> 00:29:04,320
I don't want to say anymore. I want to
turn the cameras off.

389
00:29:05,340 --> 00:29:06,340
I'm embarrassed.

390
00:29:06,620 --> 00:29:09,340
Turn the cameras off. Why don't you say
hello to your friends and relatives?

391
00:29:11,500 --> 00:29:13,360
Hello, Aunt Bertha and Uncle Edgar.

392
00:29:13,900 --> 00:29:16,700
Oh, I lost you again. If only you could
see me now.

393
00:29:45,590 --> 00:29:49,510
I don't think that there's too many
people that can make

394
00:29:50,350 --> 00:29:54,310
make love better than Barbara Jo and I.
We get it on pretty good.

395
00:29:54,530 --> 00:30:00,510
And I think that whatever we do, we do
whatever turns us on.

396
00:30:00,750 --> 00:30:06,090
In our fantasy, it's a type of thing,
okay, I'm the dominant person.

397
00:30:06,430 --> 00:30:07,830
Jim is the submissive one.

398
00:30:10,030 --> 00:30:12,470
In real life, I don't think it's that
way at all.

399
00:30:12,670 --> 00:30:17,490
It's definitely not that way. He's over
me, which I like, and I really like that

400
00:30:17,490 --> 00:30:18,009
a lot.

401
00:30:18,010 --> 00:30:19,150
I don't know if...

402
00:30:20,200 --> 00:30:23,900
Liberation does not always lead to
Andrea's happy ending.

403
00:30:24,340 --> 00:30:29,300
Sexual freedom can become something
indulged in for the sake of fashion

404
00:30:29,300 --> 00:30:30,840
than individual desire.

405
00:30:31,200 --> 00:30:38,180
We were into a bondage type thing
through a magazine, either Penthouse or

406
00:30:38,180 --> 00:30:44,040
Gallery, one of the magazines, and they
had a picture of a torture chamber type

407
00:30:44,040 --> 00:30:47,640
situation, and we had been getting into
a bondage type.

408
00:30:48,360 --> 00:30:50,720
seen before that for our own personal
gain.

409
00:30:51,460 --> 00:30:58,020
And we saw this and we said, hey, that
would be neat, except I'm a registered

410
00:30:58,020 --> 00:31:03,200
nurse and we thought it would be neat to
do it with me being a nurse and Jim

411
00:31:03,200 --> 00:31:04,200
being a patient.

412
00:31:04,620 --> 00:31:10,040
The setting takes place in a treatment
room, supposedly a type of a hospital

413
00:31:10,040 --> 00:31:16,420
setting, and a patient is brought in
and, of course, he is impotent.

414
00:31:16,920 --> 00:31:20,720
and me being a superstar nurse, I'm
going to come in and cure him of his

415
00:31:20,720 --> 00:31:22,820
impotence. You call this a cock?

416
00:31:23,460 --> 00:31:27,180
No wonder you can't get anybody
attracted to it.

417
00:31:27,680 --> 00:31:33,180
Barbara Jo and Jim, a handsome couple
from Cudahy, Wisconsin, confidently

418
00:31:33,180 --> 00:31:38,520
arrived on the set with a prefabricated
fantasy taken from those underground

419
00:31:38,520 --> 00:31:42,880
manuals that purport to add spice and
variety to our lovemaking.

420
00:31:44,080 --> 00:31:49,180
With them, they brought their own
costumes, as well as a detailed list of

421
00:31:49,180 --> 00:31:52,140
suitable for a scene of light, bondage,
and domination.

422
00:31:52,580 --> 00:31:54,520
You would like to give an overall body
image.

423
00:31:55,480 --> 00:32:00,120
That way all your muscles just make you
relax.

424
00:32:08,120 --> 00:32:12,020
For some reason, you just don't seem to
be getting hard.

425
00:32:12,800 --> 00:32:14,300
What does turn you on?

426
00:32:14,800 --> 00:32:15,800
You, sir.

427
00:32:20,040 --> 00:32:26,660
I think I might have to teach you from
the beginning just how to be

428
00:32:26,660 --> 00:32:28,700
tender and patient.

429
00:32:30,420 --> 00:32:31,420
Lie down.

430
00:32:34,060 --> 00:32:35,740
I want to fuck you, baby.

431
00:32:36,620 --> 00:32:38,320
Then why can't you get it up?

432
00:32:39,140 --> 00:32:41,360
Let my arms free and I'll get it up.

433
00:32:43,840 --> 00:32:47,680
I don't like my patients not to
cooperate, you arrogant bastard.

434
00:32:48,360 --> 00:32:50,000
You just lay down there.

435
00:32:51,120 --> 00:32:52,780
And I want you to relax.

436
00:32:53,180 --> 00:32:54,900
Just relax, baby.

437
00:32:55,560 --> 00:32:58,300
Because what I'm going to put you
through, you'll never forget.

438
00:33:01,720 --> 00:33:04,520
I can't hear you. I don't know what
you're feeling.

439
00:33:04,740 --> 00:33:07,940
How in the hell are we supposed to know
what you're feeling?

440
00:33:08,650 --> 00:33:12,150
Aren't these three women enough for you?
Do you want four, five, six?

441
00:33:12,750 --> 00:33:14,470
What the fuck do you want?

442
00:33:15,250 --> 00:33:17,850
Make it hard, baby. You can do it.

443
00:33:18,230 --> 00:33:19,290
Oh, please.

444
00:33:19,830 --> 00:33:20,830
Please.

445
00:33:22,190 --> 00:33:23,450
You've got to.

446
00:33:23,830 --> 00:33:26,310
Don't ruin my reputation, Palmer.

447
00:33:26,630 --> 00:33:27,630
Please.

448
00:33:29,270 --> 00:33:31,170
You're still not working.

449
00:33:34,850 --> 00:33:37,590
You're not making my ego any better.

450
00:33:39,530 --> 00:33:41,590
What do you think I am, just a play toy?

451
00:33:42,730 --> 00:33:45,050
Don't you want to get hard for me? Yes.

452
00:33:45,290 --> 00:33:46,670
Aren't you hot for me?

453
00:33:47,270 --> 00:33:48,690
Don't you want to fuck me?

454
00:33:50,150 --> 00:33:53,170
I want a nice, hard fucking cuss.

455
00:33:53,510 --> 00:33:58,430
It became apparent that the
paraphernalia and role -playing were

456
00:33:58,430 --> 00:34:00,370
little help to Jim and Barbara Jo.

457
00:34:01,130 --> 00:34:04,550
They both struggled to achieve a state
of physical passion.

458
00:34:04,910 --> 00:34:08,429
But the struggle finally became painful
to everyone concerned.

459
00:34:09,150 --> 00:34:13,050
And there was a general agreement to
stop filming a scene that was not being

460
00:34:13,050 --> 00:34:19,929
enjoyed by the people in it. I felt that

461
00:34:19,929 --> 00:34:23,170
I had something to prove that I ended up
not proving.

462
00:34:23,510 --> 00:34:24,510
That's what I felt.

463
00:34:24,810 --> 00:34:25,810
What was that you had to prove?

464
00:34:26,210 --> 00:34:32,730
Well, I tell you, I feel that I really,
what I said when I first walked into

465
00:34:32,730 --> 00:34:34,710
here actually happens to be a fact.

466
00:34:35,260 --> 00:34:41,600
and uh under the stress of the situation
or whatever it might be i couldn't uh i

467
00:34:41,600 --> 00:34:47,260
don't feel that i did what i wanted to
do okay hey man i have been in every

468
00:34:47,260 --> 00:34:52,760
whorehouse from that side of vietnam to
the other side and in moscow and in

469
00:34:52,760 --> 00:34:58,220
madrid spain and a lot of different
places and this is i mean take it for

470
00:34:58,220 --> 00:35:02,520
it's worth believe it or not that's the
god's honest truth and i have

471
00:35:03,440 --> 00:35:08,300
I've read porn books or whatever you
want to call them since I was this high.

472
00:35:09,240 --> 00:35:16,160
And I figure that we can get it on
together, and I wish

473
00:35:16,160 --> 00:35:19,740
that I could have it on film.

474
00:35:25,280 --> 00:35:30,080
While the preceding scenes were being
filmed, a camera had been kept on Taji.

475
00:35:30,640 --> 00:35:34,160
waiting to record the slightest signs of
astral passion.

476
00:35:35,240 --> 00:35:39,440
Before leaving, she had mentioned that
her flight plan included the beach of

477
00:35:39,440 --> 00:35:43,020
Waikiki, where she hoped to beguile a
Hawaiian surfer.

478
00:35:44,060 --> 00:35:47,940
From the way she was breathing, it
seemed something pleasant was happening

479
00:35:47,940 --> 00:35:53,680
voyage, but questions as to where she
was or whom she was with still brought

480
00:35:53,680 --> 00:35:54,680
response.

481
00:35:55,800 --> 00:35:57,420
While the wait continued,

482
00:35:58,200 --> 00:36:02,760
The production prepared for the fantasy
of Sterling Jones, a young man who had

483
00:36:02,760 --> 00:36:07,580
made it very clear where he wanted to be
and what he wanted to do when he got

484
00:36:07,580 --> 00:36:08,580
there.

485
00:36:27,630 --> 00:36:32,230
I didn't know they were on vacation, but
their daughter was there with her

486
00:36:32,230 --> 00:36:36,350
friends, you know, and, like, you know,
they were smoking pot and everything,

487
00:36:36,510 --> 00:36:39,550
and they were, you know, in their
pajamas.

488
00:37:07,660 --> 00:37:08,660
Come in, okay?

489
00:37:08,680 --> 00:37:09,980
Yeah, you come in. Yeah.

490
00:37:11,120 --> 00:37:13,040
Hey, I want you to meet my friend.

491
00:37:14,820 --> 00:37:15,820
Come in.

492
00:37:20,700 --> 00:37:21,700
Where?

493
00:37:25,460 --> 00:37:27,320
Hello. Hi. How are you?

494
00:37:28,180 --> 00:37:29,180
Oh.

495
00:37:29,480 --> 00:37:30,880
Hi. Hi.

496
00:37:31,420 --> 00:37:34,180
Why don't you put it on? I bet you won't
get to pay.

497
00:37:53,299 --> 00:37:55,800
come on let us look

498
00:38:06,960 --> 00:38:11,120
Come on, let's get it on. Wait a minute,
Mama.

499
00:38:13,840 --> 00:38:14,940
Oh, man.

500
00:38:16,500 --> 00:38:20,800
Do it, Timmy.

501
00:38:45,240 --> 00:38:46,640
There's enough for everybody.

502
00:38:47,420 --> 00:38:48,420
Snacks.

503
00:38:50,040 --> 00:38:54,040
Well, if my rap was like this, I would
get fired.

504
00:38:57,320 --> 00:39:03,560
You can tell your boss you took a lunch
break, dinner break, coffee break.

505
00:39:11,300 --> 00:39:12,560
That was fantastic.

506
00:39:13,390 --> 00:39:20,010
it was even better than my fantasy it
was beautiful it was so beautiful oh man

507
00:39:20,010 --> 00:39:25,070
all those pretty ladies oh i just
couldn't believe it because it uh in my

508
00:39:25,070 --> 00:39:32,010
fantasy a fantasy is something that's
unreal you know and um this this came to

509
00:39:32,010 --> 00:39:37,270
life you know and it was it made me kind
of nervous you know but it was

510
00:39:37,270 --> 00:39:43,220
fantastic it was beautiful and I love to
do it again. I do it again and again

511
00:39:43,220 --> 00:39:44,320
and again and again.

512
00:39:44,560 --> 00:39:45,560
It's fantastic.

513
00:39:48,360 --> 00:39:51,100
My fantasy basically is femme.

514
00:39:51,580 --> 00:39:54,760
What I mean is I love femme. I love to
be around femme.

515
00:39:55,300 --> 00:39:57,040
And I also like to be femme.

516
00:39:57,600 --> 00:40:00,980
I like to dress in feminine clothes.

517
00:40:01,420 --> 00:40:03,720
I like to be around girls.

518
00:40:04,500 --> 00:40:07,900
But yet the unusual part about it is I'm
really not gay.

519
00:40:08,420 --> 00:40:15,150
And I just... love to be and be femme,
like I just said, which would seem a

520
00:40:15,150 --> 00:40:21,170
little unusual, but basically I like to
have somebody, let's say, thought either

521
00:40:21,170 --> 00:40:27,290
completely dressed as a girl or the
other way around, and every time I see,

522
00:40:27,350 --> 00:40:29,890
like, female clothes, sort of, that
turns me on, too.

523
00:40:30,470 --> 00:40:35,910
Sandy Light, a transvestite from
Riverdale, New York, walks into a

524
00:40:35,910 --> 00:40:38,330
that he has seen many times in his
imagination.

525
00:40:38,910 --> 00:40:43,610
The women present accept him as one of
their own sex, and the owner of the bar

526
00:40:43,610 --> 00:40:48,930
finds him, as a woman, an exciting
interlude in an otherwise slow evening.

527
00:40:51,130 --> 00:40:57,210
In his fantasy, Sandy's true sex remains
hidden during the preliminary

528
00:40:57,210 --> 00:41:02,970
caresses and seductions, and the
difficult removal of the many baffling

529
00:41:02,970 --> 00:41:04,990
garments in which he'd wrapped himself.

530
00:41:05,590 --> 00:41:07,570
Why the hell do you wear all this crap?

531
00:41:08,200 --> 00:41:12,780
All you've got to do is lose about eight
pounds and you wouldn't need all this

532
00:41:12,780 --> 00:41:15,400
shit. Well, I'm quite heavy over here,
see?

533
00:41:16,240 --> 00:41:17,240
Over where?

534
00:41:17,320 --> 00:41:20,180
Well, why don't you just see for
yourself?

535
00:41:22,860 --> 00:41:25,240
All I have to do is pull the buttons.

536
00:41:26,120 --> 00:41:27,180
The buttons here?

537
00:41:27,400 --> 00:41:28,400
Mm -hmm.

538
00:41:34,580 --> 00:41:35,580
That's a joke.

539
00:41:37,000 --> 00:41:39,460
How do you know I'm not going to be a
little bit uptight and throw you the

540
00:41:39,460 --> 00:41:41,000
out of here? I just hope you won't.

541
00:41:41,720 --> 00:41:43,460
Because everyone needs a little change.

542
00:41:43,720 --> 00:41:49,380
Really? When the secret behind the
slips, zippers, pads, and girdle is

543
00:41:49,380 --> 00:41:55,320
revealed, Sandy proves that clothes do
not necessarily make the man and

544
00:41:55,320 --> 00:41:59,640
convinces his sophisticated lesbian
lover that even old -fashioned

545
00:41:59,640 --> 00:42:04,740
heterosexuality can be used now and then
for a refreshing change of pace.

546
00:42:14,859 --> 00:42:20,720
I thought it was very good. I thought
that it was acted out really to the T. I

547
00:42:20,720 --> 00:42:27,620
mean, it's what really could happen, did
happen, and it turns

548
00:42:27,620 --> 00:42:28,620
me on.

549
00:42:28,760 --> 00:42:29,880
How did you feel afterwards?

550
00:42:30,120 --> 00:42:34,180
I'm only asking because it seems that
you tell us you feel very satisfied.

551
00:42:34,460 --> 00:42:35,660
You look very morose.

552
00:42:37,360 --> 00:42:39,660
Very sad. Is it post -colonial
depression?

553
00:42:39,980 --> 00:42:46,340
No, it's just the fact that, believe it
or not, being this way, I must feel very

554
00:42:46,340 --> 00:42:47,340
messed up.

555
00:42:47,460 --> 00:42:50,780
And when I feel messed up like that, it
upsets me.

556
00:42:51,260 --> 00:42:55,580
So that's why I might feel a little sad.
Do you feel we're really prying into an

557
00:42:55,580 --> 00:43:01,440
intimate moment now? Well, at the end of
a fantasy such as mine, when you're

558
00:43:01,440 --> 00:43:05,840
physically messed up, hair, dress, etc.,

559
00:43:08,440 --> 00:43:14,880
Actually, that is an intimate moment
because you want to go back to she

560
00:43:15,580 --> 00:43:18,520
And usually because of that, you would
like to be left alone.

561
00:43:20,700 --> 00:43:27,260
My fantasy is, well, one good one is
that

562
00:43:27,260 --> 00:43:34,140
I can become at will a man. I mean, I
can just go and I'm a man.

563
00:43:34,240 --> 00:43:35,820
But my mind is still,

564
00:43:38,080 --> 00:43:41,720
that I'm a woman. Only I look exactly
like a man, and I mean I'm really

565
00:43:41,720 --> 00:43:42,720
gorgeous.

566
00:43:44,060 --> 00:43:50,260
And I go into this gay bar, and I'm out
to get this guy. I'm really out to get

567
00:43:50,260 --> 00:43:51,980
him, but he screwed me over, so I'm
really out to get him.

568
00:43:52,700 --> 00:43:56,440
So I go into the bar, and I pick him up.

569
00:43:56,760 --> 00:44:02,140
Where Sandy hid his true self for the
sake of a pleasant surprise, others

570
00:44:02,140 --> 00:44:04,540
a sexual change for less happy reasons.

571
00:44:05,210 --> 00:44:10,670
Terry King, a New York secretary, had
suffered for five years from the effects

572
00:44:10,670 --> 00:44:13,230
of a love affair with a man who was
homosexual.

573
00:44:13,750 --> 00:44:18,970
Now, in her fantasy, she wants to
overcome this unhappy memory by assuming

574
00:44:18,970 --> 00:44:23,710
male form and enticing the image of her
former lover into a scene of

575
00:44:23,710 --> 00:44:25,310
embarrassment and revenge.

576
00:44:25,870 --> 00:44:30,570
I knew that he was gay, but he would
always do all this really physical

577
00:44:30,570 --> 00:44:33,430
mean, he would always really come on to
me, you know, sexually.

578
00:44:34,060 --> 00:44:35,060
All the time.

579
00:44:35,260 --> 00:44:39,080
And then when he really got me so that I
really fell in love with him, he

580
00:44:39,080 --> 00:44:42,320
started going back into the bit, well, I
just, this will never work out. And

581
00:44:42,320 --> 00:44:46,600
then part of the time he would be, well,
I really love you and I want this to

582
00:44:46,600 --> 00:44:50,520
work out. And the rest of the time he
would be screwing around with guys and

583
00:44:50,520 --> 00:44:52,280
saying it's never going to work.

584
00:44:53,180 --> 00:44:57,960
So in the end, I really got screwed over
because I really fell for him.

585
00:44:58,220 --> 00:44:59,920
I missed you last Friday, Terry.

586
00:45:00,940 --> 00:45:01,940
Last Friday?

587
00:45:03,560 --> 00:45:05,040
We had a date. A date.

588
00:45:07,360 --> 00:45:09,740
Remember? Oh, yeah. I forgot all about
it.

589
00:45:10,180 --> 00:45:11,800
Well, listen. This is a new night.

590
00:45:12,720 --> 00:45:15,120
And we can just pretend that our date
was for this night.

591
00:45:16,640 --> 00:45:17,680
Thoroughly. Right?

592
00:45:18,000 --> 00:45:19,280
Just like you were going to meet.

593
00:45:19,760 --> 00:45:20,900
Right? Mm -hmm.

594
00:45:21,460 --> 00:45:23,500
And we can go out now.

595
00:45:24,480 --> 00:45:25,780
Maybe. Really?

596
00:45:27,509 --> 00:45:30,290
I put him off sexually. I don't do
anything with him.

597
00:45:30,610 --> 00:45:35,590
After a while, when he really gets into
it, I decide finally to go to bed with

598
00:45:35,590 --> 00:45:40,190
him. And we just get to the point where
we're really going to do it, where he's

599
00:45:40,190 --> 00:45:41,450
really getting off on it.

600
00:45:42,130 --> 00:45:45,930
And then I change back into me, and I
really freak him out.

601
00:45:49,370 --> 00:45:52,090
Can you just wait here for a second?
Just wait here for a minute.

602
00:45:53,190 --> 00:45:54,190
Okay, just a minute.

603
00:46:00,520 --> 00:46:04,940
It is something that I get off on the
thought of doing because it's sort of a

604
00:46:04,940 --> 00:46:08,360
revenge kind of thing that I could never
do except in my mind.

605
00:46:09,260 --> 00:46:15,980
And, you know, the idea that I could
really, really do this to somebody

606
00:46:15,980 --> 00:46:19,720
who really deserves it.

607
00:46:24,440 --> 00:46:26,560
You rotten son of a bitch.

608
00:46:28,580 --> 00:46:29,580
Nothing, nothing.

609
00:46:30,920 --> 00:46:33,600
But you're saying enough things before
enough things you said to me.

610
00:46:34,560 --> 00:46:36,440
What? You meant what?

611
00:46:37,220 --> 00:46:38,220
You meant what?

612
00:46:38,500 --> 00:46:41,820
Everything. Everything when? You meant
everything tonight, you rotten son of a

613
00:46:41,820 --> 00:46:44,600
bitch, because you thought I was a big,
macho guy. Well, now you're surprised,

614
00:46:44,780 --> 00:46:45,780
huh?

615
00:46:45,820 --> 00:46:47,540
You meant everything you said when?

616
00:46:50,180 --> 00:46:54,400
Son of a bitch, you just want to come
crawling to me now just because I showed

617
00:46:54,400 --> 00:46:55,400
you up for what you are.

618
00:46:56,560 --> 00:47:00,120
Oh, God, look at the look on your face.
How could you even...

619
00:47:00,520 --> 00:47:03,700
After all that, how can you even look at
me? You're like, I'm here in this, and

620
00:47:03,700 --> 00:47:07,200
you even, you can even look at me? You
should be so fucking embarrassed you

621
00:47:07,200 --> 00:47:09,100
should crawl under the goddamn bed.

622
00:47:09,380 --> 00:47:12,600
Is that what you want? Yeah, that's what
I want you to do. I want you to crawl

623
00:47:12,600 --> 00:47:15,080
under the bed like the little worm you
are.

624
00:47:15,300 --> 00:47:16,540
Crawl under there, you fucker.

625
00:47:16,760 --> 00:47:20,080
Crawl under that bed. You gotta push me.
I'll push you under the bed. Okay,

626
00:47:20,120 --> 00:47:23,340
we'll push you under the bed. Just get
the fuck under there, you bastard.

627
00:47:23,940 --> 00:47:25,520
Son of a bitch.

628
00:47:26,900 --> 00:47:29,780
It was fun telling him all this. Stay
there when you belong, asshole.

629
00:47:30,540 --> 00:47:31,640
What am I going to do tonight?

630
00:47:31,840 --> 00:47:32,840
Oh, God.

631
00:47:34,040 --> 00:47:36,680
Oh, I don't know. I'll probably go out
and get done.

632
00:47:37,280 --> 00:47:40,220
I feel... I don't know.

633
00:47:43,300 --> 00:47:47,220
Well, my fantasy is entitled The Feather
Fantasy.

634
00:47:48,600 --> 00:47:53,820
And it takes place in pilgrim times, and
it's the town square.

635
00:47:54,320 --> 00:47:56,440
And there are ten men lined up.

636
00:47:56,750 --> 00:48:01,330
at the stocks with their arms tied
behind them and the feather person which

637
00:48:01,330 --> 00:48:05,970
the part i would like to play comes by
them undresses them very quickly and he

638
00:48:05,970 --> 00:48:10,470
goes up with the feather to each of
their cocks and this is the most

639
00:48:10,470 --> 00:48:16,650
part is that they he tickles them and
they get hard and when they all come

640
00:48:16,650 --> 00:48:22,720
are released and they have to go back
into the town square and it's

641
00:48:22,720 --> 00:48:26,200
for them. It doesn't matter what they
did that was wrong, probably wasn't even

642
00:48:26,200 --> 00:48:28,540
wrong, but it doesn't matter.

643
00:48:28,760 --> 00:48:29,980
This is their punishment.

644
00:49:06,520 --> 00:49:13,300
I want them to really get turned on by
it. They are

645
00:49:13,300 --> 00:49:16,300
enjoying it, but it's humiliating to be
enjoying it in public.

646
00:49:29,960 --> 00:49:33,580
The idea that they get turned on in
spite of the fact that they're straight

647
00:49:33,580 --> 00:49:38,880
in spite of the humiliation, but that's
very difficult to happen realistically.

648
00:49:42,700 --> 00:49:44,200
My fantasy is irrational.

649
00:49:44,720 --> 00:49:46,720
You know, fantasies aren't rational
things.

650
00:49:48,360 --> 00:49:50,220
Who are you?

651
00:49:52,180 --> 00:49:53,180
What?

652
00:49:54,180 --> 00:49:55,180
Sucker's cock.

653
00:49:55,220 --> 00:49:56,220
No.

654
00:49:57,120 --> 00:49:58,480
I said sucker's cock.

655
00:50:00,580 --> 00:50:01,800
No. Fuck it, Carl.

656
00:50:04,320 --> 00:50:05,640
You better listen to me.

657
00:50:10,640 --> 00:50:11,780
You do what I tell you.

658
00:50:12,600 --> 00:50:13,600
Get down.

659
00:50:16,160 --> 00:50:17,560
Carl? Yes, James?

660
00:50:21,480 --> 00:50:27,460
Uh, well, what are we gonna do? Because,
uh... Well, it's not working.

661
00:50:32,870 --> 00:50:35,390
Sorry. How do I feel?

662
00:50:36,410 --> 00:50:38,970
I feel like you should have gotten gay
guys for my fantasy.

663
00:50:40,730 --> 00:50:43,790
I mean, they're straight. They're
attracted to women.

664
00:50:44,230 --> 00:50:46,890
I want to say I'm sorry if I hurt you.

665
00:50:47,130 --> 00:50:48,470
The whipping I rather liked.

666
00:50:48,690 --> 00:50:49,690
Really?

667
00:50:50,330 --> 00:50:53,890
You could also be ripping your clothes
off. Yes, I got off on that. I got off

668
00:50:53,890 --> 00:50:55,190
that very much. Very much.

669
00:50:56,090 --> 00:50:57,650
That was great.

670
00:50:58,270 --> 00:51:01,870
But I'm a little disappointed that I
didn't get to see you all come. I would

671
00:51:01,870 --> 00:51:02,870
like to see that.

672
00:51:03,390 --> 00:51:07,810
I'm very disappointed. I think you
should have gotten people who would have

673
00:51:07,810 --> 00:51:09,070
able to be turned on by this.

674
00:51:09,350 --> 00:51:13,210
I think that's your job. I told you my
fantasy. You know what had to be done.

675
00:51:13,550 --> 00:51:18,190
And it's understandable that straight
guys wouldn't be able to get it up that

676
00:51:18,190 --> 00:51:23,930
way. This is obviously a straight film
with little outlook

677
00:51:23,930 --> 00:51:26,810
as to...

678
00:51:28,620 --> 00:51:35,340
how a gay person might perceive it, I
think, because of the outcome of my

679
00:51:35,340 --> 00:51:38,520
fantasy and also the people that were
chosen.

680
00:51:40,400 --> 00:51:46,920
The three guys, they're not fantasy
figures for me.

681
00:51:47,160 --> 00:51:50,060
I was a little disappointed with the
choices.

682
00:51:50,520 --> 00:51:51,520
Are you pissed off at us?

683
00:51:52,380 --> 00:51:53,380
A little.

684
00:51:53,520 --> 00:51:54,600
A little what?

685
00:51:54,940 --> 00:51:57,020
A little pissed off. I'm disappointed.

686
00:51:57,880 --> 00:52:00,440
Other fantasies faltered in the making.

687
00:52:01,660 --> 00:52:06,880
John Schmozik and Karen Frohart, a
couple from Seattle, Washington, who

688
00:52:06,880 --> 00:52:12,380
to make love to clowns in a funhouse
surrounded by distorting mirrors, got

689
00:52:12,380 --> 00:52:17,240
in a pleasant but aimless orgy and
forgot about completing their scene.

690
00:52:21,080 --> 00:52:26,920
Esther Lester, a truck driver from New
Jersey, used a little too much bourbon

691
00:52:26,920 --> 00:52:31,700
prepare for her performance, and her
dream of being an artist's model came to

692
00:52:31,700 --> 00:52:35,580
untimely end when she had to be helped
down from her pedestal.

693
00:52:37,900 --> 00:52:43,520
And Don Farrar from Omaha, Nebraska, who
wished to be one among a group of

694
00:52:43,520 --> 00:52:48,000
waiters whose semen would be used as
salad dressing by ladies at an elegant

695
00:52:48,000 --> 00:52:52,460
outdoor luncheon, found it too difficult
to contain his excitement until the

696
00:52:52,460 --> 00:52:53,700
proper course and...

697
00:52:53,930 --> 00:52:56,250
prematurely seasoned the ladies' suit.

698
00:52:57,110 --> 00:53:01,330
Some people's fantasies changed in the
process of being filmed.

699
00:53:01,810 --> 00:53:06,870
Jim Mann, a student from Rutgers
University, wanted at first to

700
00:53:06,870 --> 00:53:09,070
made love to by a trio of women.

701
00:53:23,500 --> 00:53:28,420
Carol Ann Baumberger also wanted to
appear in an orgy of more than modest

702
00:53:28,420 --> 00:53:30,480
proportions. Why do you want to be in
the shot today?

703
00:53:30,800 --> 00:53:36,240
It's going to help me in my own thing to
get to know people and how they act and

704
00:53:36,240 --> 00:53:37,740
react to each other.

705
00:53:38,500 --> 00:53:41,760
And besides, you know, if it turns me
on, well, then that's worth the whole

706
00:53:41,760 --> 00:53:42,760
thing.

707
00:53:42,840 --> 00:53:47,360
I'm going to try to make his fantasy as
good as I want mine to be.

708
00:53:48,040 --> 00:53:51,420
However, when Jim and Carol Ann met
before the cameras...

709
00:53:51,690 --> 00:53:55,990
and the shooting of Jim's fantasy began,
they were so taken with each other that

710
00:53:55,990 --> 00:54:01,270
they both forgot to behave in proper
orgiastic fashion and simply made love

711
00:54:01,270 --> 00:54:02,270
each other.

712
00:54:03,230 --> 00:54:09,350
Jim, now much more relaxed than when he
arrived, left to return to school and

713
00:54:09,350 --> 00:54:11,190
recount his adventures to his friend.

714
00:54:11,790 --> 00:54:17,150
But Carol Ann had enjoyed herself so
thoroughly that she decided to stay on

715
00:54:17,150 --> 00:54:21,360
location. and appear as often as
possible in the fantasies of others.

716
00:54:23,200 --> 00:54:28,700
And then there was Greg Hart, a high
school psychology counselor, whose

717
00:54:28,700 --> 00:54:31,440
nature itself conspired to inhibit.

718
00:54:31,720 --> 00:54:37,740
But my sexual fantasy is that I would
like to be with a blonde

719
00:54:37,740 --> 00:54:40,320
chick, a blonde girl.

720
00:54:40,880 --> 00:54:42,460
She has to have blonde hair.

721
00:54:43,420 --> 00:54:45,580
She doesn't have to be that great
looking.

722
00:54:46,220 --> 00:54:51,020
that nice looking but uh she doesn't
even have to be that busty either she

723
00:54:51,020 --> 00:54:55,980
you know 36 is acceptable um 24 36.

724
00:54:56,700 --> 00:55:02,840
uh but what i would like to do with her
is first of all i'd like to uh sort of

725
00:55:02,840 --> 00:55:09,320
you know make out with her and um then
after that well that's foreplay

726
00:55:09,320 --> 00:55:15,590
uh and then after that um really this is
necessary part is the

727
00:55:15,590 --> 00:55:21,350
lubrication the lubrication would be
crisco oil in a can

728
00:55:21,350 --> 00:55:28,350
then i would like to put my hand into
the crisco and then with my fingers

729
00:55:28,350 --> 00:55:34,230
slowly enter her ass very very slowly
and very gently

730
00:55:34,230 --> 00:55:41,030
and in a way fist fucker that is is what
the terminology is

731
00:55:41,810 --> 00:55:44,430
And when I'm going in, I'm not going for
depth.

732
00:55:44,690 --> 00:55:46,750
Depth, you would go right up to the arm.

733
00:55:47,190 --> 00:55:50,370
But I'm going for width, which is that
way.

734
00:55:50,990 --> 00:55:53,650
I can't overemphasize the points. I
could dream them true.

735
00:55:55,330 --> 00:55:56,330
But you're real.

736
00:55:56,670 --> 00:55:57,670
Yeah.

737
00:55:59,390 --> 00:56:00,410
I'm really here.

738
00:56:01,930 --> 00:56:02,930
I'll be part of you.

739
00:56:06,250 --> 00:56:07,550
You can do whatever you want.

740
00:56:51,020 --> 00:56:52,020
is so remarkable.

741
00:56:54,340 --> 00:56:55,340
What?

742
00:56:55,820 --> 00:56:56,820
So white.

743
00:56:57,060 --> 00:56:58,100
So white.

744
00:57:01,780 --> 00:57:03,260
I need your mouth.

745
00:57:04,380 --> 00:57:05,600
I can't.

746
00:57:06,880 --> 00:57:08,440
You want me to open your pants?

747
00:57:32,200 --> 00:57:33,200
Okay, take my shirt off.

748
00:57:48,280 --> 00:57:49,380
Take your blouse off.

749
00:57:55,840 --> 00:57:56,860
Not fast enough.

750
00:58:20,240 --> 00:58:22,940
You're perfect for me. Do you know that?
Do you know that?

751
00:58:23,480 --> 00:58:24,480
You're perfect.

752
00:58:27,780 --> 00:58:30,220
Just let the doubt respond.

753
00:58:43,140 --> 00:58:44,140
Unbutton that.

754
00:58:47,880 --> 00:58:49,300
I didn't say unzip, did I?

755
00:58:50,000 --> 00:58:51,000
I said unbutton.

756
00:58:51,960 --> 00:58:53,040
Did I say unzip?

757
00:58:53,860 --> 00:58:54,860
Okay.

758
00:58:57,380 --> 00:58:59,140
I just said unbutton, period.

759
00:59:08,220 --> 00:59:09,220
Good.

760
00:59:11,300 --> 00:59:12,300
Now unzip.

761
00:59:16,820 --> 00:59:18,760
Is that the right way to treat my
clothes?

762
00:59:19,260 --> 00:59:20,260
Put it right there.

763
00:59:26,360 --> 00:59:27,360
Up.

764
00:59:39,440 --> 00:59:40,440
Down.

765
00:59:43,980 --> 00:59:44,980
And suck.

766
00:59:55,020 --> 00:59:56,020
Pete's good.

767
01:00:03,400 --> 01:00:04,460
Take your panties off.

768
01:00:09,000 --> 01:00:10,000
Take your shoes off.

769
01:00:16,700 --> 01:00:18,000
You know what I'm going to do with this
cock?

770
01:00:26,280 --> 01:00:27,280
Turn over.

771
01:00:28,800 --> 01:00:29,800
Over.

772
01:00:34,300 --> 01:00:35,300
Over.

773
01:01:04,110 --> 01:01:11,030
What I'm going to do, I'm going to take
the Crisco, work it

774
01:01:11,030 --> 01:01:14,770
into my hands, and work it into your
ass.

775
01:01:18,690 --> 01:01:19,690
Understood? Yes.

776
01:01:24,410 --> 01:01:25,410
Don't worry.

777
01:01:26,370 --> 01:01:27,370
Everything's going to be all right.

778
01:01:28,070 --> 01:01:29,110
Okay? Okay.

779
01:01:30,030 --> 01:01:32,110
You let me know when there's the least
bit of pain.

780
01:01:55,880 --> 01:01:56,880
Let me know.

781
01:01:57,860 --> 01:01:58,860
Okay.

782
01:01:59,800 --> 01:02:01,340
That's all you have to say. Okay?

783
01:02:02,560 --> 01:02:07,200
Do you trust me? If you trust me, relax.

784
01:02:08,860 --> 01:02:09,860
Okay?

785
01:02:13,420 --> 01:02:15,280
Is the position comfortable for you?

786
01:02:16,580 --> 01:02:18,640
Maybe if you open your legs up a little
bit.

787
01:02:19,260 --> 01:02:20,660
Good. Okay.

788
01:02:23,020 --> 01:02:24,120
And just relax.

789
01:02:25,640 --> 01:02:26,800
And think of me.

790
01:02:28,420 --> 01:02:29,420
Just relax.

791
01:02:45,300 --> 01:02:51,280
You know what I do in a case like this?

792
01:02:52,340 --> 01:02:53,700
Do you know what I do?

793
01:02:55,120 --> 01:02:56,120
Hmm?

794
01:02:59,820 --> 01:03:01,540
I won't, but I have feelings for you.

795
01:03:05,440 --> 01:03:07,020
You know, I would force it in anyway.

796
01:03:10,800 --> 01:03:12,380
I would force my hand in there.

797
01:03:13,960 --> 01:03:15,480
And I would put my cup down.

798
01:03:17,060 --> 01:03:19,400
Since I have feelings for you, I can't.

799
01:03:25,710 --> 01:03:26,890
Just remember next time.

800
01:03:28,890 --> 01:03:29,890
Okay?

801
01:03:32,350 --> 01:03:37,710
I was a little spaced out, I guess. I
was very disappointed in myself that I

802
01:03:37,710 --> 01:03:39,670
couldn't fulfill his fantasy.

803
01:03:40,470 --> 01:03:42,150
Because I had really, really wanted to.

804
01:03:42,650 --> 01:03:45,270
I didn't know what it was, but I thought
whatever it was, I could certainly

805
01:03:45,270 --> 01:03:46,270
handle it.

806
01:03:46,510 --> 01:03:47,510
Were you frightened?

807
01:03:48,370 --> 01:03:49,370
Was I frightened?

808
01:03:49,530 --> 01:03:50,530
Yeah.

809
01:03:50,730 --> 01:03:52,590
I think I was frightened the first time
he hit me.

810
01:03:53,970 --> 01:03:54,970
You know.

811
01:03:55,240 --> 01:03:58,880
Your initial thing is panic.

812
01:03:59,260 --> 01:04:02,920
And when somebody hits you, especially
as hard as he hit me. But then I

813
01:04:02,940 --> 01:04:06,420
well, maybe that'll be the only time he
hits me. So, you know, I would be

814
01:04:06,420 --> 01:04:07,420
willing to put up with that.

815
01:04:07,560 --> 01:04:08,560
Why didn't you stop it?

816
01:04:09,860 --> 01:04:13,440
I didn't want to stop the scene. I
wanted to keep it going.

817
01:04:14,020 --> 01:04:18,780
I thought I would take it as far as... I
thought I would take it to the end.

818
01:04:19,450 --> 01:04:22,290
But you were terrified of that guy?
Yeah, he was pretty crazy. You could

819
01:04:22,290 --> 01:04:24,230
looking at his eyes. I don't know what
it'll look like in the film.

820
01:04:24,550 --> 01:04:30,730
But when I looked in his face, he didn't
see cameras.

821
01:04:31,450 --> 01:04:33,790
He didn't see any other people in the
room. He just saw me.

822
01:04:34,410 --> 01:04:38,510
And he was really into it. He was going
to fulfill his fantasy. And I was going

823
01:04:38,510 --> 01:04:39,510
to try to help.

824
01:04:40,010 --> 01:04:44,030
As far as I'm concerned, the person I do
this with is just an object.

825
01:04:45,070 --> 01:04:48,930
But it could be with someone you love.
Yes, very much so.

826
01:04:49,340 --> 01:04:51,620
And would that change your attitude at
all?

827
01:04:53,040 --> 01:04:55,760
Do you think you could do it to someone
you like?

828
01:04:57,100 --> 01:05:03,540
Wow, you're really hitting at a real
point that, you know... I

829
01:05:03,540 --> 01:05:06,920
really... I don't think I could.

830
01:05:07,880 --> 01:05:12,660
To me, it's one... I have to divorce and
separate two different things.

831
01:05:13,220 --> 01:05:15,520
I can't say what I haven't experienced.

832
01:05:16,460 --> 01:05:17,580
Okay, but...

833
01:05:17,840 --> 01:05:21,320
I don't think I could do it. I think I
could only do it as an object.

834
01:05:21,600 --> 01:05:28,600
And if I fell in love with this
particular woman, I think that would

835
01:05:29,320 --> 01:05:30,680
I don't think I could do it.

836
01:05:31,940 --> 01:05:38,000
Sexual violence takes a more complex and
mysterious form in Robert Kazmaier's

837
01:05:38,000 --> 01:05:39,000
imagination.

838
01:05:39,320 --> 01:05:44,480
Filled with personal symbols and images,
his erotic dream is both frightening

839
01:05:44,480 --> 01:05:45,480
and beautiful.

840
01:05:45,740 --> 01:05:47,940
My fantasy begins in a chapel.

841
01:05:48,940 --> 01:05:52,020
In the chapel, there is a woman.

842
01:05:53,280 --> 01:05:59,900
She's past her prime of life. She was
once very attractive, but she's not very

843
01:05:59,900 --> 01:06:03,700
attractive. The shades of her beauty are
still there.

844
01:06:04,280 --> 01:06:10,800
She's dressed in the outside of a
wedding gown, the diaphanous part, but

845
01:06:10,800 --> 01:06:13,080
underneath, she's completely nude.

846
01:06:18,930 --> 01:06:20,650
She prays in the chapel.

847
01:06:24,910 --> 01:06:31,810
And then I am there, and I see myself as
a young man, probably younger than I

848
01:06:31,810 --> 01:06:32,769
am now.

849
01:06:32,770 --> 01:06:34,150
I feel somewhat numb.

850
01:06:35,530 --> 01:06:39,310
This wasn't what I wanted to happen, but
it has happened.

851
01:07:42,060 --> 01:07:44,060
And then we are walking through a wood.

852
01:07:45,900 --> 01:07:47,800
First we walk slowly.

853
01:07:50,380 --> 01:07:52,280
She starts to walk ahead of me.

854
01:07:54,020 --> 01:07:55,160
She looks back.

855
01:07:57,580 --> 01:08:00,280
Something in my face scares her and she
starts to run.

856
01:10:12,620 --> 01:10:13,620
I'm on a beach.

857
01:10:13,900 --> 01:10:16,220
The sun feels good on my back.

858
01:10:16,860 --> 01:10:23,120
After so much strain and mayhem, we
returned to the quiet repose of Taji.

859
01:10:23,380 --> 01:10:27,900
Since the production would soon be
coming to an end, it was a relief to see

860
01:10:27,900 --> 01:10:30,220
signs that Taji was returning to us.

861
01:10:30,580 --> 01:10:31,960
I see a surfer.

862
01:10:32,720 --> 01:10:34,840
I am reaching out towards him.

863
01:10:35,360 --> 01:10:36,940
He's yielding completely.

864
01:10:38,240 --> 01:10:39,760
Together we're climbing.

865
01:10:51,720 --> 01:10:57,620
I can say very honestly and truthfully
is that everyone, should they decide to

866
01:10:57,620 --> 01:11:04,460
take up astral traveling, they would
find it a kind of relaxing vacation away

867
01:11:04,460 --> 01:11:06,660
from the body in itself.

868
01:11:10,620 --> 01:11:16,060
You know, I've got this dress at home
and it's white. It's a long gown.

869
01:11:16,760 --> 01:11:21,220
It was curious that of all the people
who participated in the making of this

870
01:11:21,220 --> 01:11:27,340
movie, only Vanessa Vanderbilt, now
arriving in the limousine, used the

871
01:11:27,340 --> 01:11:30,400
of being filmed as an integral part of
her fantasy.

872
01:11:31,300 --> 01:11:37,300
Having enjoyed a rich variety of sexual
experiences in her private life, she now

873
01:11:37,300 --> 01:11:41,040
wanted to see if she had the courage to
repeat some of them in front of a

874
01:11:41,040 --> 01:11:42,040
camera.

875
01:11:54,280 --> 01:11:59,740
I imagine myself coming into, it's like
a big party, a big dance, a ball.

876
01:12:00,560 --> 01:12:04,140
And my head has a white bandana of some
kind.

877
01:12:05,000 --> 01:12:09,980
And I spot him or her.

878
01:12:11,700 --> 01:12:16,340
And it just flows, you know, we're
dancing, music is right all night.

879
01:12:17,240 --> 01:12:23,180
I love doing things that are not the
norm. I like doing things that are

880
01:12:35,020 --> 01:12:40,100
As soon as the music and filming began,
it became apparent that Vanessa was

881
01:12:40,100 --> 01:12:44,100
having no trouble at all making her
secrets a subject for public viewing.

882
01:13:14,640 --> 01:13:19,660
By her scene's conclusion, Vanessa had
become so adept at collaboration with

883
01:13:19,660 --> 01:13:24,280
cameras that she improvised a lovely
scene of photographed passion.

884
01:14:23,760 --> 01:14:29,920
If I were to say I felt alive, that
would be... The word alive would be

885
01:14:29,920 --> 01:14:31,080
down what I really felt.

886
01:14:31,680 --> 01:14:36,260
To be able to be open, honest with
myself, to share, to love.

887
01:14:36,720 --> 01:14:39,260
It's like I'm just... I just came into
the world.

888
01:14:42,900 --> 01:14:47,340
I don't masturbate often, since I don't
have to.

889
01:14:47,780 --> 01:14:50,880
But when I do, it's not...

890
01:14:51,230 --> 01:14:55,770
The picture of a woman or the picture of
two women or the picture of a man and a

891
01:14:55,770 --> 01:14:58,390
woman is a picture of myself that I
like.

892
01:14:58,710 --> 01:15:05,610
See, I can see my body. I can see myself
there, and I'm attracted to it.

893
01:15:05,710 --> 01:15:11,870
I want to touch it. I want to feel it,
you know? Just to know that I could

894
01:15:11,870 --> 01:15:16,550
go like this, and this is my body, turns
me on.

895
01:15:16,970 --> 01:15:19,470
I love the way I move.

896
01:15:21,180 --> 01:15:27,120
talk i love oh it's so good i love the
way i my skin feels

897
01:15:27,120 --> 01:15:33,880
and i love i love the shape of my penis
i love to touch it i love to cherish

898
01:15:33,880 --> 01:15:38,120
it doesn't it doesn't even have to be
sexual all the time just to touch it

899
01:15:38,120 --> 01:15:44,540
to feel it it's so wonderful it's like
an extension of myself and that

900
01:15:44,540 --> 01:15:51,470
of myself makes me feel whole makes me
feel complete i would love to Make

901
01:15:51,470 --> 01:15:56,890
love to myself even as a man, but if I
could transform myself in a woman I

902
01:15:56,890 --> 01:16:03,690
make love to that that body there which
would be me as a woman That would be

903
01:16:03,690 --> 01:16:05,070
that would be so good

904
01:16:38,520 --> 01:16:40,000
Hands touching me.

905
01:16:45,100 --> 01:16:46,280
Touching me all over.

906
01:16:49,820 --> 01:16:51,260
God, she feels good.

907
01:16:54,300 --> 01:16:58,140
And I want to see myself as a woman.

908
01:17:13,040 --> 01:17:14,040
hair to be long.

909
01:17:15,380 --> 01:17:16,380
I'm flowing.

910
01:17:24,380 --> 01:17:26,340
My hair needs to be long.

911
01:17:27,440 --> 01:17:31,640
Long so I can wind my fingers around it.

912
01:17:45,710 --> 01:17:50,870
And my face, my face is showing, it's
showing,

913
01:17:50,970 --> 01:17:54,650
it's showing my passion.

914
01:18:34,670 --> 01:18:35,670
I look beautiful.

915
01:18:46,730 --> 01:18:49,150
I'm... I'm making love to myself.

916
01:18:50,490 --> 01:18:55,410
You... You are the image of myself.

917
01:18:55,970 --> 01:18:57,350
You are me.

918
01:18:58,350 --> 01:19:00,950
The two sides of me.

919
01:19:01,970 --> 01:19:03,330
The two sides of me.

920
01:19:07,700 --> 01:19:09,260
You don't get me so excited.

921
01:19:50,090 --> 01:19:52,290
the best fuck I would ever get.

922
01:19:52,710 --> 01:19:53,850
Don't you see it?

923
01:19:56,910 --> 01:19:59,570
The last fantasy comes to an end.

924
01:19:59,810 --> 01:20:06,190
The toys and gadgets of movie making are
put away and cast and crew begin to

925
01:20:06,190 --> 01:20:08,390
return to the realities of the city.

926
01:20:09,110 --> 01:20:13,950
Before everyone goes his separate way, a
gathering is held that is both a

927
01:20:13,950 --> 01:20:18,230
farewell party and a private screening
for those whose fantasies have been put

928
01:20:18,230 --> 01:20:19,230
on film.

929
01:20:19,620 --> 01:20:25,600
The stars, collected all together,
watched themselves in performance and

930
01:20:25,600 --> 01:20:27,240
their dreams looked from a distance.

931
01:20:28,100 --> 01:20:31,080
Some, of course, were delighted by what
was on the screen.

932
01:20:31,560 --> 01:20:33,240
Oh, I'm definitely in love with myself.

933
01:20:33,520 --> 01:20:34,520
There's nothing to worry about.

934
01:20:35,200 --> 01:20:36,200
What happened?

935
01:20:36,680 --> 01:20:37,680
Come on.

936
01:20:37,800 --> 01:20:38,860
How can you do that?

937
01:20:39,380 --> 01:20:40,380
That's all I get.

938
01:20:41,160 --> 01:20:43,580
I'll be darned if we just couldn't turn
down again.

939
01:20:49,710 --> 01:20:51,590
Next time I will shave.

940
01:20:51,830 --> 01:20:52,830
See what happens.

941
01:20:54,710 --> 01:20:56,710
Shave. Shave the beard.

942
01:20:57,050 --> 01:20:59,010
It was even better than I expected.

943
01:20:59,270 --> 01:21:01,270
I smiled all the way home on the plane.

944
01:21:02,430 --> 01:21:06,210
The man next to me said, you look so
happy. And I said, oh, I am.

945
01:21:06,470 --> 01:21:12,570
I thought maybe I'd work on the hockey
team.

946
01:21:21,100 --> 01:21:24,100
Yeah, I had a beautiful time. The best
time I had in my life.

947
01:21:24,660 --> 01:21:26,460
Love it.

948
01:21:30,340 --> 01:21:31,340
Sexy devil.

949
01:21:31,920 --> 01:21:33,860
God damn you, sexy devil.

950
01:21:34,400 --> 01:21:39,220
And I know I'm not crazy for a lot of
the feelings and my thoughts, my

951
01:21:40,500 --> 01:21:44,920
They're not the norm. And I'm not crazy.
All of you accepted that.

952
01:21:45,380 --> 01:21:46,380
Okay?

953
01:21:46,880 --> 01:21:50,200
You better believe it. You accepted it.
You know, it was just...

954
01:21:50,640 --> 01:21:52,300
You helped make it all possible.

955
01:21:53,480 --> 01:21:56,060
And since then, I've just felt I'm okay.

956
01:21:57,540 --> 01:21:58,760
I'm fucking okay.

957
01:21:59,860 --> 01:22:06,360
Really did a lovely, beautiful sex act
without it being what they call dirty

958
01:22:06,360 --> 01:22:07,360
these days.

959
01:22:07,580 --> 01:22:11,180
Oh, this is as good as the jury duty
that I was on for 52 days.

960
01:22:13,640 --> 01:22:18,080
But some were baffled and found it
difficult to believe that they were

961
01:22:18,080 --> 01:22:19,820
part of the scenes they looked at.

962
01:22:21,000 --> 01:22:22,080
It was so strange.

963
01:22:23,880 --> 01:22:28,740
I don't think I really looked like a man
because I know that I'm not.

964
01:22:29,200 --> 01:22:31,640
But I don't know if I would look like
somebody who didn't know.

965
01:22:32,500 --> 01:22:38,000
I never told the real guy exactly what I
told the actor. I really never let that

966
01:22:38,000 --> 01:22:41,940
anger come out like I should have.

967
01:22:43,240 --> 01:22:45,280
Probably I would have been a lot happier
in the long run.

968
01:22:45,920 --> 01:22:49,520
I have to say to myself, why do I have
such a fantasy?

969
01:22:50,440 --> 01:22:56,980
And if I have such, to have such a
fantasy of destroying the one that I

970
01:22:56,980 --> 01:23:02,040
means that the last scene must be there.

971
01:23:02,380 --> 01:23:05,940
But the last scene is you wearing a
dress in church. It absolutely

972
01:23:05,940 --> 01:23:12,720
me. Because I have in a way become, the
act of destruction means that I must

973
01:23:12,720 --> 01:23:18,560
take on the loneliness of her, the...

974
01:23:19,560 --> 01:23:26,000
The longing, the guilt, and all of that
I express that way.

975
01:23:26,660 --> 01:23:31,440
I'm able to realize that my fantasies
have to stay fantasies. And some were

976
01:23:31,440 --> 01:23:36,340
frankly not too happy with the image of
themselves they now offered for public

977
01:23:36,340 --> 01:23:41,900
viewing. While I was watching, I'm
saying, is this really me doing it? Is

978
01:23:41,900 --> 01:23:42,900
me?

979
01:23:46,190 --> 01:23:49,670
Okay, that's part of me and that's the
part inside of me.

980
01:23:49,970 --> 01:23:53,190
See, I'm usually a quiet, reserved, very
shy guy.

981
01:23:53,930 --> 01:23:57,750
The part inside that wants to cry out is
that part.

982
01:23:58,530 --> 01:23:59,730
And that's what I did.

983
01:24:01,090 --> 01:24:05,170
Nevertheless, they all felt it had been
an experience from which they had

984
01:24:05,170 --> 01:24:06,770
learned a great deal about themselves.

985
01:24:07,250 --> 01:24:12,210
And later, as they danced and celebrated
the end of their movie, a close

986
01:24:12,210 --> 01:24:14,030
comradeship formed among them.

987
01:24:14,830 --> 01:24:19,630
As for those of us who made the film,
all we can truthfully say about the

988
01:24:19,630 --> 01:24:23,850
behavior you've watched is that it was
spontaneous and on point.

989
01:24:24,730 --> 01:24:30,250
You may have found it compelling,
offensive, or amusing, but it was human

990
01:24:30,250 --> 01:24:35,230
behavior for which neither apologies nor
theories are really needed.

991
01:24:57,350 --> 01:24:58,350
You

